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They ate off of me alive and left : the boundary of self sacrifice

Self sacrifice

self sacrifice

What is the line between empathy and self-sacrifice? Well it is contextual. It should be. For a hopeless romantic like Steve who has no boundary for others but who is yet virgin and jobless and worrying if his girlfriend would cheat on him if he doesn’t sleep with her. He gives away his last 25 dollars for a homeless looking thief who danced in front of him only to get in to his pocket.

I spent most of my life worrying about what others think of me. My most life is on top but pretending to fulfil the social self , I have to make everyone happy .

My recent endeavour creates peace for couple with dysfunctional relationship but took my time and decency away. They all have one thing in common: for everything they receive, they expect more. And you are needed until you can give.

Life is good when lived for self first. Even the book says, if you have two,give one. If you only have one, how can you share?

read more on three layers of success that helps you where you are and why you are sacrificing instead of living.

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The cost of working for others

The cost of working for others vs the opportunity of working for yourself.

The cost of working for others

Now a day seems that every guru and every teacher claims you should be working for yourself. The once known world that slaved the society willingly to enrich few capitalists has seemed to have passed and being replaced with new way of diverse capitalism. We are on a time that a small kid in his mother’s basement making apps and creating platforms, trying to become the capitalist, starting only with 100$. When their story is told it goes like this. ‘they started with only 100$ in their mother’s basement and they now have more than 500 employees.’ This is a new way of capitalism given to anyone who has talent.

The question is whether you should work for others the rest of your life or start your own journey. The real question is ‘’what is the cost of working for others compared to the opportunity of working for yourself.’’

I am currently working for a design firm that is paid in millions and that pays me a half a penny out of a dollar. I wonder what’s worth half a penny for doing the whole work. But we are still living in this imperialistic world where the ‘industrialist’ is the owner and the rest poor has to work their thing off to get the penny to survive for the day.

Our parents lived in this era of hard work for nothing only to dream of the future, appreciating their relative settlement from neighbours. In fact, some lost their life thinking of pensions and life after 60. They bought a house on loan, they lived to pay for it. They worked hours on a factory ground, and they paid hundreds if not thousands for the medicine in latter days. As they worked hours and hours for the dictator (could be enclosed with the skin of entrepreneur) they barely knew, they cried their eyes out telling their love for them and left their position for that young cocky guy graduated from prestigious college.

Working for others is a great way to express yourself or make use of your talents or you can eat for the day or live to pay rent like our parents did.

But the questions is should we be doing this even today?

I will show you two reasons that you should consider working for others.

1-If you are young.

If you are that sassy girl fresh from school then go for it. Sometimes my students at the university ask me what should I do after school. I would say ‘You should have figured that out while you were at school’. Of course, for a jock. But I often say, looking the fear on their face Work for two years for a firm that could teach you how to handle clients, how to engage in bids, how to be prominent, how to manage employees and how to do the work.

2-If you don’t have the capital to start.

This generation, the internet generation, has  unrealistic expectation of life. Some say do what you love and go for hiking for weeks. Some walk on tiny rope in Russia. The notion of motivation motivate us to follow our small passion but avoid the giant in the room. The truth is whatever you do it is never new. You could progress the world but it’s hard to reinvent the world. That’s why the philosopher says, ‘’stop changing the world. The world does not change. It only progresses.’’ Work is necessary. You can’t jump of off a cliff living off you mother’s couch. In this case start your carrier working for others.

If you have both, then I say it is costly to work for others than work for yourself and build a legacy.