I don’t know what to do in my life

“I don’t know what to do in my life” Many people question the purpose of their life on earth. They are confused. If you feel that you don’t know what you are doing, if you are bored of life and you need it won’t happen, you are not alone. Many people are trying to figure it out. People in the first world are looking for a deeper meaning of life that could get them happiness. They are searching the secret key that could show them the trail to eternal success and purposeful life.

If you are like most of the people out there, you don’t know what to do in your life. You keep pushing yourself into over thinking, depression and over compensation of your actions by doing what things that hurt you. Forgetting your purpose and live for others as if others are better than you are.

You don’t stand for nothing because it does not matter if you choose the first or the second. It all same for you as long as they like it. Or as long as it fits. You don’t have your choice, your friends choose what you order for lunch, at least you hesitate.

This is not all new. But you should figure out your life before it is too late. I will give you five points you should consider to figure out what you have to do I your life so that you could be happy.

1-Change a place

Most of the time, where we live what we do affects our life. If you are dependent and if you waste your money living off your mother’s couch, think again. You should stand up and get the hell out. You should start your own life. The purpose of life doesn’t come to you on air like the myths. You should go and find them. The good things in life are not handed cheap, they need you dig a surface, enter a pit, wash the dirt off, filter the valuable from the rest and you shall find them in smallest form shiny and beautiful. Asking a question, reading more on purpose does not change a thing. You shall go out and hustle.

The first step should be being responsible. Even though this doesn’t make a sense, this is the path. And it is messy. You shall go through it. And think again, in the dark there is the enemy, there is the wild beasts there are the insects that drink out your blood out of your body. But you have to do it any ways. You should stand up and find your destiny. And that is not found in your messy bed room and that is not in your friend’s conversation and that is not in that rich man’s pocket and that is not in new boyfriend’s world. It is inside you and you should find it by going against the wind.

2-Stand for something

“If you haven’t found something you are willing to die for, you aren’t fit to live.” -Martin Luther King, Jr.

If you don’t have value to live with, if you don’t have purpose to live for, you are not fit to live. This is harsh, I know. And it hurts me much to say this. But that is the truth. And the truth shall set us free. If you don’t have value in life, then set it now. The book says ‘’love others as much as you love yourself.’’ You are not obliged to love others more than you love yourself. You are told, even in religion, to love others as much as you love yourself. And even if you want, you can’t.

You should set your value here. A drug head who says he loves you or a woman with multiple partners who thinks she is in love with you, does not love you. Because she does not love herself in the first place. She does not love her body. She does not value it. Your purpose is aligned with your value. What you value in life affects your way to your purpose. After realizing this, you should be able to figure out for what to stand for. What is that itches you for long and you shut your lips off not to speak. What is it that only you are thinking about to change but no one else does. Think what is that one thing you want to do so that the people will recognize you for.

While talking about how he selects winners on a competition, a professional photographer jury, said ‘’If I say, damn, I wish that was my work, then It means it is good work.’’

Look up to people whose life is more fulfilled than you. What are they doing? Can you stand for what they stand for? Can you copy their cause in your own context or invent one, aligned with your purpose? Do something.

3-Have a challenge

Challenges make you stronger. If you are like those boys in your town who chew tobacco all day and look for clubs at night watch out. You will keep questioning yourself for the rest of your days. You need to have a target to achieve a year from now, gain 20 pounds. Lose 12 pounds, finish school before 30, get a raise at job. A challenge makes your stronger. It gives you reason to live for.

Promise to wake up at 6 every day.

And do it. I know this is very little. But this are the things that we wish to have looking other’s life. Wake up and get exercise, make breakfast and surprise your family. Run few kilometres each day.  Or write 1000 words about your life every day. Have note book and write your thoughts. Do the things that you were procrastinating for months. Stand up and do them.   Don’t quit until the day you promised yourself to finish.

4-Write your life and change it

Start a diary. If you already have it. Then read it back and see what is similar. What is the top three things that you complain about? Single them out.  You know life is vague and cannot be told as a movie that you see in an hour or two. It’s much more complicated. I know African story that father told us when we were children.

There was a farmer with bulls and cows on his farm.

Every night, the barn was without peace. The noise from the cattle could not give him sleep and neighbours were complaining a lot.  He thought for a while and the next evening he separated the cattle in two places. He noticed the one on the left slept peacefully that night. The next morning, he separated the groups of bulls that were disturbing all night. And he noticed one group was peaceful.

He kept separating the group that was making noise and fighting. You know the ending. At last he found that it was one bull that was disturbing the group and he had to work on that bull to make it useful for his farm. Life is same. You have to understand your life, figure out your purpose out of the blurred world and be it. Writing gives you a tool to dissect your thoughts.

5-You make the rules

After all, you make the rules. When you study hard at school, who got the A? It was you. When you don’t study and get D, it was you who get that. It is up to you to study or not; to be or not to be. You make the rules.  Then make the rules. One person I have heard speaking on social media once said, you have to find what you want to do even if that does not seem useful and do that.

Shape your thought, what you wear, how you speak, with whom to be and do that.

Don’t listen what the world says. Don’t listen to your hesitating heart. Design your life style around what you want to do and practice it for years. Don’t rush. What is got with time is more valuables. Work on yourself. Don’t flinch from your life design. Be that everywhere until you want to change that. Then one day you will find yourself telling your story for other. You will find yourself inspiring others. But your live starts here.

Now, I have told you five main points. To find your purpose, first you have to change your physical conditions, then you should figure out what to stand for, even if it seems silly. Then to achieve that or other goals in life set a goal and challenge yourself. And on the process, change your habit. Document your life and reflect on it and finally review your life and make the rules to design your life.

And live that life you imagined the heck out it.

 

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