what do I want to do with my life_image

what do I want to do with my life? figuring out what to do with your life

what do I want to do with my life? figuring out what to do with your life is not that hard. Your are probably here to figure out what to do with your life. you could be confused. there are many people like that who keeps asking what do i wan to do with my life? This happens at every age, not only at young age. Sometimes you become what you want to be and all is set and you have no more to do. or you have even never tried yet.

what do I want to do with my life_imagesometime life becomes too demanding and overwhelming for many. That is alright. There is a lot going on in the world. It is normal to feel lost and to ask what do I want to do with my life, especially if you don’t have a proper coach or guide.

Here i will show you three main ways to answer the question “what do I want to do with my life?” and i will help in the process of figuring out what to do with your life.

What if some magic or miracle happens and someone asks you “what have you done with your life?” Stop reading and think 3 things you have done with your life. If you can count three and if you believe these things are aligned with your purpose and if you are happy, then you are on to something.Read no more.

But if you are like most people , you are stuck on the first list. You even don’t believe what you did was useful. “I got your degree but so what?; My pretty face doesn’t do nothing for me…” This is what many people i meet say to  me.

Most say “I want to be someone great, known , a celebrity.” But they don’t know how and doing what.  The problem is most people out there want to be something but they can’t say what it is. They want to marry but they can’t say what type person. They say they have a plan but they have done nothing the last few years.

The world is full of people who does not know what they need. They only hope tomorrow and curse today.

The first short cut to becoming do something fast is to think in details. To figure out to what niche to stick to. There is a small book that talks about changing life by changing the general perception of life.(i don’t remember the title, it has been more than a decade since I read it) In one of the chapters the author talks about a story of  a woman he met on his workshop. She told him she wanted to be an author for all of her life but she could not start.

Then he noticed the problem and he continued asking, “what kind of author?”

She paused. “What do you mean?”

“What type? Comedy, children, horror, romantic story…”

It was all of a sudden clear for her. the answer was all in front of her all her life. what she had to do was to think smaller.  And one simple question gave her few books with in a year time.

I believe that one has to think in little details. Details matter much in life since the world is going for specialisation. Specialisation is efficient way of solving a challenge, no matter how it confines one in to a corner. One can become laser focused into being one thing and strive to be good in it.  Many known authors specialise in one genre. Musicians also do that.

Instead of being an author, think what kind of author you want to be. If you want to become entrepreneur then what type. Online, offline, what do you want to sell.

This leads you to the second step. Here you need to identify your strength. If you can’t sit long hours, don’t try to be a programmer. If you can’t speak don’t be journalist, although possible. It is similar to believing your DNA. (term borrowed from Gary vaynerchuk)What you are good at since birth. if you can write, then learn what to be in relation to the first step.

Read an article on Entrepreneurial DNA. Do you have it? 

Third, just list as much as you can things that you can do in the three columns. Ask your self  “what do I want to do with my life?”

Things I enjoy and cant get enough as a hobby Things i have learn Things I already know
1-Fashion 1-Fixing my car 1-I have degree in     economics
2- 2-real estate

After than come back after few hours and revisit your list. Cancel out these you really cant do now . This could be due to time constraint or resource, money or even passion. Then come up with three on the top. Next is to go back to the first tip, that is to go in details. Instead of saying i want to write about fashion, say i write about a specific brand or specific out fit. Do that for one year. And improve along the way.

what do i want to do with my life is a common question among many. I gave you the three short cuts to figure out what to do with your life. What you have to do what you have chosen after reading this article without hesitation. Then your will be fine.

Please share your experiences in the comment section. If you want to talk to us in private please write us here.

hope-for-tomorrow-images-grandself

What am I waiting for? Why we blindly wait with hope for tomorrow

The world is a by-product of waiting and hope. We hope for tomorrow with nothing to show on today. We are taught to wait.  One of the serious problems that tomorrow holds is its unknown factor. As  Lincon once said the best way to predict the future is to make it. It is in fact harder to sit and wait for a chance than to stand up and change the future.

One of the problems of the modern-day school is it teaches you a master- worker process from an early age. Even after school, we are conditioned to expect someone to tell us what and when, and, moreover, we are hungry for approval. We dream for a teacher with a smile and a warm welcome to applause us and tell us we did well. Like we raise our hands to speak or to visit the bathroom, we now look for permission.

We urge someone to tell us whether to marry that girl we have been dating for more than a year. Therefore; we stand and hesitate, “is she even the one?” Our mind needs someone to guide us which path to take next. Then we tend to avoid heavy thought. We start to act reckless, do whatever comes to mind and whatever comes along and we wait for tomorrow for no avail.

Here are 4 reasons why we wait for tomorrow, the unknown.

1-Fear.

Fear is the primary factor for success and failure of life. It is fear that governs the world. And through the rear, the powerful manipulate the rest. We have fear of losing our homes, we have to lose from our family member, we have a fear of losing our husbands and wive. our life is full of fear. The environment itself has the mechanism to control us with its systems. The mortgage, the school fees, the fast-changing life… This all makes us numb from an early age. Only those who have examples before them and those who have the fortune to go on will succeed faster in life, at least it seems. Out of fear we freeze and wait for tomorrow to magically intervene and save us.

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2-Waiting for someone to tell us what to do.

As age progresses maybe realize than they have been waiting for something, a father or mother figure to tell them what to do. Our parents, like the school system, have fed us, read us stories at the bedside, they lull us when we cry and the buy us everything we need. “Don’t cry?” they say, weeping our tears.

They cared for us and we barely learned to be strong alone. For this we dare break laws and we wait for parents to save us, and they usually did, even lying. And growing up, without any physical and psychological challenges, we tend to be children forever secretly waiting to grow with hope for tomorrow.

3-Religion “hope”, the bible says.

Hope, the book defines it as believing of the unknown without seeing the impact today. Hope is good in itself. Because it is what that extends many people’s lives in this chaos detested world. But when hope becomes a personal cult and excuse that is the greater challenges. The bible itself says belief without work is nothing. You should work. Those apostles and followers themselves have worked to feed themselves. People like Paul have sewed tents to make money. Religion doesn’t ask you to sit and hope for tomorrow.

What you have to do it to have a purpose in life. propose it necessary. Many people who suffer from this syndrome are those aimless people. Then have goals and schedules of doing them. If you have done nothing until now, it is probable that you won’t do much in the future, unless you change. Then you should realize that unless you are the luckiest guy in the world, you won’t become day or even one day. That is fantasy. Think about what you want to be and work to get that. And accept whatever chance that comes along. The rest is fantasy. The rest is hoping for tomorrow to make miracles.

4-Hesitation

Hesitation is a mind’s way of avoiding possible risk. It’s good then since it helped ancestors avoiding acting for fearing the sound they heard in the woods. Hesitation in this age is a liability. It kills. It is nothing more than a sign for the lazy. If you hesitate you are likely to lose. This is the principle.

Minutes before I was asked to speak on a conference on the result of my two-month life project that also created this blog.   I hesitated for a moment. “Can I speak? Am I the best here to talk? What if there are others with better experience? What would the rest think what if I fail…”  Even if I know I could do it, I hesitated. “Maybe other time”, I said, ignoring the request.

The syndrome of modern education is it makes the smart hesitates. If you have noticed it is smart that hesitates a lot. “Wait”, the mind says. What is there is a better way to do it and what if someone else could do it better and what if they don’t like it?

What if.

One can kill hesitation by learning that there is no perfect timing or perfect fit for many things. The best time is now. Don’t hesitate.

Hope for tomorrow but don’t sit and wait for it.

hesitate _ grandself

Killing hesitation. Why don’t have to hesitate and it is time to do great

hesitate _ grandselfHesitation is a mind’s way of avoiding possible risk. It’s good then since it helped ancestors avoiding acting for fearing the sound they heard in the woods. Hesitation in this age is a liability. It kills. It is nothing more than a sign for the lazy. If you hesitate you are likely to lose. This is the principle.

The syndrome of the modern education is it makes the smart hesitators. If you have noticed it is the smarter that hesitates a lot. “Wait” the mind says. ” Is there is a better way to do it? What if someone else could do it better what if they don’t like it? ”

The whole idea of this article came today when I was asked to speak on an event. Someone asked me to book me on the schedule to speak on a conference. I hesitated for a moment. “Can I speak? Am I the best here to talk? What if there are others with better speech? What would the rest think what if I fail…” These are the unconscious cries of my mind? I know deep inside the heart I have the resource and the capability to do it. But I hesitate.

The one thing you have to think is life is a progress.

If the secret of life is really to grow, then growth is life time job. You can’t grow with in a year or two. It is continuous and life time. You do what you can do perfectly. Don’t worry what you could have done or how perfect you can do something. For example If I save to give speech the best time is now since there is no maxim of best time for it.

I believe one has to learn to respect the process than the end. The end could come out as anyway. What mater is enjoying the process and sharing it.

One can kill hesitation by learning that there is no perfect timing or perfect fit for many things.

What there is a prepared mind and body. If you’re prepared to do something and if you truly believe that it benefits others then do it. Don’t hesitate.

If you think it the best time to start your business, don’t hesitate. Find people who can help you and start. If you think you should be able to start a job, then stand up now and do it. Never hesitate. If you want to ask that girl out and if you think you should give it a try then do that. Don’t even think more. Just go and do it like a crazy person. As long as you don’t hurt others and yourself it is fine. I believe you can give a break your hesitating mind by taking responsibilities. Do things responsibly. Take calculated risks. Just do it. Never think twice. Never hesitate.

 

 

 

 

finding your passion

Lessons I learned about finding your passion, how do you find your passion?

Passion is the only fuel that drives life. Without it the world would have end up becoming lazy. Passion guides ways and make things done. And this passion could originate out of pure talent for the thing or out of fear as seen in some inventors or out of boredom.

However, without passion one won’t be successful.

Then how can one find passion.

As a child, I had an ambition and passion for various things that I rarely overwhelms me. I loved English poetry, I loved self-help books, I loved science especially space science, and theoretical physics, I loved philosophy and some of psychology.

Without enough time dedicated for these, I was a book worm sitting at a corner the small library trying to understand complex theories.

This was fun until it does wasn’t. I grew and life became real. I learnt that university makes us choose a single subject to study; the culture forces us to marry a single person and economics forces us to give birth to a certain number.

As the world demands “specialised talent”, a general of everything becomes irrelevant. Then, finding your passion is necessary.

The challenge is choosing few from what the world could offer. No matter how scary and boring it seems, finding your passion in the few is necessary.

The basic lesson I got through time is your passion lays in one of the three spaces: your knowledge, your habit and what you want to know.

1-your knowledge

A doctor has much better knowledge about haemorrhoid than an engineer. That is a knowledge. A child of entrepreneurs is usually an entrepreneur before maturing. This is knowledge and skill developed from experience. If you have immense knowledge in a single topic, you might find it easy to develop passion for it.

2-Habit

Habits could be developed without formal education. Habits could be passions. But these habits should be either useful to the world or could make money. Habit for fun is only a labor of love. This, you could do it in free time and not as a permanent life business.

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3-What do you want to know?

Fixing your car, dating, becoming small business owner. If you wish it enough, not for the knowledge sake itself, but also for its appeal for you, then why don’t you pursue it as a passion?

It is hard to find a passion in this world. Everyone wants to be an athlete in athletics season; everyone wants to be a king after game of thrones is aired. You get my point. The information overload helped the mind wobble more than ever. Passions change every day. A yesterday’s college student is a today’s your tube’s wannabe star. Yesterday’s soldier is today’s Uber driver. The world is changing and so is our mind.

The secret to finding your passion is to look back inside. If you look closer , you will find it covered and waiting to be unveiled.

The first step to finding your passion is to look inside and ask what is it I like to do every day without getting tired. What is that one thing that could do me all night no matter how I feel. I know people who stay up all night to come up what a single structure for the building they are designing. That is a passion, if not insanity.

Ebay advice on what to sell on the site is to look back to home and to find something that you haven’t used long.  It is there you find it soon.

This should be useful. Don’t mention your compulsive gaming habits as a passion until you can find a way to change it to something useful for others and for yourself. This is time waster until it becomes otherwise for you.

Then find what you are good as and bad in life. I am bad at watching soccer. I hate that thing. That is time wasting. For my friend who is obsessed with every game, every major league is a passion in deed. He talks about it every second of the next day about the last game.

I am good at analyzing problems; at listening other’s challenges and give practical but great insights. I am good at self-discipline and easily understand complex theories.

Then figure out what to do with it. If you have good singing voice, sing with it. Don’t care what I am doing or what your best friend is doing. At least do it as a spare time passion. If you can write, start your blog. If you can act, and you love it, join a community with same interest. Start your you tube channel.

Passion is best when seen with purpose ,and purpose is an end. Keep working not matter what the current performance says. With consistent work, you will get there. But all starts with finding your passion.

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Finding your purpose : A short guide on finding your purpose for success

Finding your purpose is a tough task. Finding your purpose is a life time job. There is no ultimate answer for what your purpose is. Because the idea of purpose grows with age and a maturity. Finding your purpose is indeed a person responsibility. People usually wait for eternal involvement for finding their purpose. We might have encountered people who are lost and pass their days on a couch, thinking what their purpose before birth is.

Others struggle through paying thousands to attend consultation, consulting astrology and other similar sciences for finding their purpose.

Finding your purpose _imageIs it you who should find your purpose?

We have talked how purpose of life could be seen from personal or general perspective. Some have assigned personal purpose from state perspective others from religion and other from mystical and philosophical.

But when it comes to an average person whose resources are limited to a bound point, finding a purpose from all this point is irrational.

Life is indeed to be appreciated. It is good to do good. At the same time, every person should find their purpose in this vast world. Only this was one can become a useful part of the society.

How: finding your purpose.

To find your purpose,  follow three major criteria. As I said before purpose is something you want to live for. For some, it is service, or others is it is creative field. For others, it is entrepreneurial arena.

1-Stick to your DNA.

Gary Venyrchuck in his book talks about DNA. DNA in his understanding is a person’s strength. For some physical is easier than mental. For tall people playing basketball is easier that the average height people. Some are shy and they need to communicate through text. Others are obsessed with self so they like to be the spot light. If you believe your instinct and stick to what your DNA says to you, then you can start with that.

Check Gary’s best selling book on how to cash in on your passion.

2-What you know and what you do.

A practising doctor has thousands of times better chance of living with same job as a purpose than an average person. What you know is what you learnt in school or at home or anywhere else. What you do can be your skills and hobbies. If you’re good at fixing things this could be your purpose.

3-what makes you happy.

What is that one things that you won’t see your watch to stop. What is that one thing that ticks you and takes you all night without being tired. If you have one you are lucky, you should stick to that, even as part timer.

Finding your purpose what to do next.

Finding your purpose this way needs to list the things that you have unique things under the points discussed above. After that you need to reorganise these in to their relations. For example, you might be good at sewing cloths. But if you curse your fate while doing that, then that might not be you. Move on. In everything you do, happiness should be the centre.

See the book on amazon

Three tips for finding your purpose faster

When one becomes mature, its obsession with death begins. A man/woman is known with their fair attitude in life that is life is not fair and that is OK. And I shall do something about it. That is, it. Whatever you want to do, if you don’t do it as fast, you are not that useful. So, don’t overthink do it.

If you agree with this here are three pointers that are useful for finding your purpose.

1-Don’t over think.

Your life is not better than others until you become useful. A useful person has many lives as they live for others, above themselves. Overthinking is a way of the mind to escape reality. Doing is better than thinking. Testing in doing should be the method. If you find one big vision in life test if for some months and find out. if you don’t like it move on to the next. That is why we said finding purpose is a life time job.

2-Have a time off. Mind wobbles.

Thoughts are not reliable. They are managed according to the environment you are in. When you are happy with what you do, you want to do it for life until you are not happy with it once again. Instead of relying on your wobbling mind in the chaos world, find a peaceful time, away from the work and life. Take a week or 3 weeks’ time off and think deep on what you want.

3-write it.

As I said the mind wobbles. Finding your purpose is big. You should see it in fractions. You should divide it in to days and hour. What you have thought every hour could be useful. Start writing, if you don’t until now. You don’t know what you are missing. Read it once a week and reflect on it.

4-Ask others of what you are good on.

We human are good in criticizing others but not ourselves. We tend to run away from self-examinations. People tell you when you do bad but they don’t tell you what good you have. That is part of the critical culture. To know that you have then you shall ask.

Finding your purpose in life begins with finding what you are good an , what you can do and what makes you happy.

For more read Gary’s book.

 

 

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The curse of modern education: 6 ways you are trained to be unsuccessful

The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
~ Albert Einstein

Education has always been a way of life for a few chosen throughout history: for these who influence the economy or the politics of the country. Many inventors and scientists, authors were lords, sons of lords or sons of rich people.

In this age education becomes a way of life for all. One has to begin its journey in schools since the age of three. They learn way of life through designed curriculum for up to 18 years.

Education is good. But modern education has some weakness.

1-It teaches you 9-5

9-5 Is a good training for the job world in the capitalist society. A person who is trained for 20 years will get used to working 9 to 5 with ease in the job world. But working 9 to 5 does not bring any more value for the world and for self, usually. For someone to be successful on grand level, one may have to hustle more hours or maybe less. At the same time, one has to be adapting to the time that is good for them to work on instead of only 9 to 5. Many people in life are trained to work in this range of time without thinking of what they are doing, what the future holds, only thinking about filling the time that is 9 to 5.

2-You expect someone to save you

I have most of the time waited for someone to come and save me from the things I do in the life after school. At school, the teachers are saviours. And that is portrayed in life same way. Most literate people are usually permission seekers, they need approval. They fear women, they fear life itself, usually. People usually wait in life, wait for someone to come and save them. They wait for someone to allow them to do what they have do, to voice their opinions, to take actions.

3- Useless information

Education is full of useless information.   Many of you might know what mitochondria is from your sixth-grade science. It is defined as energy house of cells. Many of us still doesn’t know what energy house is let alone what mitochondria is. Some of you may not even know what cell is. But this took almost a year to learn a concept that soon become irrelevant in the later life. I have never been reminded of mitochondria even for second after sixth grade until I started questioning its relevancy of it to my life.

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4- Judged based on the ability to memorize

For a student who was praised for most his life, it was unfair for me to judge education in a negative way. But truly, I had doubts some elementary school. Modern education is usually the ability to memorize than the ability to make it part of life or a character. Most of us memorized the text books to only answer few questions on exams. Education is irrelevant to life when it becomes a race to get good grades.

5-Not practical

Since the end it is all about getting accepted in to college, then it is probably a good idea to focus on passing exams than understanding and learning the real and useful substance of the education. This is probably why most Asian and African students could get better grades in the west. When education is a means of survival, you are not urged to know, but you are urged to get good grades. That is all. At the end of the year, you have got “A” on your physics courses but you can’t maintain your bulb. You got A on your management and business and you are living broke.

6-It teaches you irrelevant decency

You have to raise your hand to speak. And in later life you raise your hand to do whatever. The world is full of wolves. And you become one sheep who raised their hand before being eaten alive.

Modern education is a great part of life in the world. Without it the world would not be same. But the idea of education that is to produce people of same knowledge and structure is boring and rather useless. Education should be a place where skills are developed and freedom is exercised. Not a place of 9 to 5 with master and son dramas, and judgement based on ability to memorize that at the end of the day a useless information.

who you are _ grandself

Figuring out who you are in easy steps without much worry and time

who you are _ grandselfFiguring out who you are is a hard task. These day it seems that we are delusional with the busyness of the world and we are lost in it. It is like being lost in the storm. The problem is not with being lost the problem is in being lost in it but the problem is we are lost without second taught out our lives. The storm will come and go on its own time. No matter what we wish. It hast its own life, its own age and its own show. The Melancholy is our struggle to make sense out of it. In fact, we are lost in it, looking its temporal presence around us, its gracious thunders and hurricanes.

The way to figure out self is to think and to have time to think. If you’re caught up in the chaos of the world and trying to make sense out of the thunders and the storms then you lose.

1-The first thing I realized after long struggle with information overload is no to read or listen or learn any more, more than I do things.

Everything you do should be equivalent to everything you know. You cannot figure out your purpose without facing challenges. Reading is good but experience is better.

Surprisingly, most people who don’t read much are the visible actors of our day to day life.They dare to put their toes in to the water to test the water. They test the unknown without much information. And no matter how good or bad, they experience the result.   Next time you find your self trying to figure out who you are with excess information , stop and look back to your self. The answer is  in you. the information is only guidance.

2-Second. Listening your guts is the way to progress.

The problems I identified in my life recently are the things my guts used to tell me to do without mentioning that they were things I had to do. But procrastination and other related problems limited my engagement from doing. When your guts tell you to do something, believe me do that. Just write them down and do that. If you have to visit a long-lost friend, and you are told repetitively to do, then put what every you are doing, go and see your friend. If you are thinking to know about your car motor, or to start gym, then start them now. May be your mind is telling you to become stronger, to be more of a human.  No overthinking, just doing.

3- Third, look into yourself.

EBay advises to look back to your house to find something to sell. To find yourself, look back to yourself.  You are who you are. You are not who you are going to be.  Look back to yourself, question yourself, question your ways.

4- Forget other’s opinion if you want to make a difference.

People are usually pretentious. They pretend to be what they are not.  Three things, people talk in terms of their context, their limited experience and their current emotional state. This means their comments change based on these three points. Second people comment on your appearance and your efforts, just for the sake of commenting. My work connects me with clients. Third, people only see your cover. No one knows your inside. Listen to opinions, but don’t over salivate on them.

5-Don’t listen to your mind telling you that you are not yet there to figure out your purpose.

Doing something takes a lot of energy. Your mind it constantly distracting you from investing your energy. That is the reason you procrastinate. You keep reading, having experiences until one day you realize that no matter how much you keep reading you are not there yet. Life should be about maximizing the knowledge you already have and improving on it.

6-Finally, free mind and stillness have the answer.

It is not about yoga or religion. It is about having time with the heart and with the mind. To listen to yourself, you should stop listening to the world. The world talks and it talks in terms of its positions. These days opinions are every there. Everyone has one. If you have time for long with yourself you will easily understand the world, its ways and your role in it. If you see any region leader or any successful person, you will notice the made time for themselves to understand their life, their purpose and their destiny.

Here I will write my experience of figuring out who I am.

1-How you see your self is everything.

Don’t underestimate yourself. You are human. You are the best thing that happens to earth. No matter what others tell you, no matter how you draw yourself to be, you are still the greatest creation. Don’t see this as a lie or movement to support your self-confidence. Or nothing like fake it until you make it. I could be the most critical person you could find. I could tell you that you are a zebra if you are. Now, I will tell you again if you are, of course if you are human being, don’t discourage yourself. You are great. The difference is what you make out of your greatness. Even diamonds lose visual value if lost in valueless places. But you should know once they are found they gain their value again.

2- Knowing strength and weakness is the first step.

Veyner chuk on his book, talks about DNA. DNA is who you are, your strength. If no one can do as you can do on something that you like then do that. But before that you should note your strength and your weakness.

3- How do you want to be seen few years from now?

Most successful people ask what do I want to be after 10 years. Ask yourself, what do I want to be when it is all set and done. As the person said, you have no control on your emotion, but you have control on your actions. Based on what you want to be do that.

4-What have you done for long without realizing you are doing that.

For me, for example, started reading self-help books since 12. I dint know why I like them. I wanted to be successful and big without even knowing what is to be successful or big. Some of you may wanted to be an astronaut for long. Some of you a dancer…you name it.

your purpose _ grandself

11 things you should know to find your purpose in the world

Your purpose,

your purpose _ grandselfHere are 11 things you should know for discovering and cultivating your deepest purpose as a human being.

1- Deepest purpose comes in stillness.

You can’t understand life in a chaos. As some eastern religions teach you can understand some things by being still, out of present, meditating on a small thing.

2- Change the pattern of life to find your purpose

The day to day life gives you a homework. You don’t have time to envision your life and find your purpose. If you are lucky you have a job that you can take off a day or two or more. If you don’t use your weekends. Change your location, change your actions every time for the next two days, fast, pray and rethink your purpose.

3- Your purpose does not change but your mind does.

Some authors like…the way of the superior man…said your mind wanders, moody based on your experience. Once you like something and other times you hate it or you get bored of it. In any case your purpose still awaits to be unveiled.

4- Finding and working on your purpose pays off.

Some people work for money and lose their purpose for materials. Others live for a purpose for long, they perfect it or recreate something though it and make money for life, even though it could be late.

5- Others usually don’t like it when you live your purpose.

When you live your purpose, you have to have your own rules that negates other’s rules. You are different and unique in some ways. You have a goal that you follow and you tend to forget being a friend for all. People usually hate you for it since you show them their unfulfilled purpose. Others hate you because they will see you leave in the middle of wasted time. People judge you because they see you through their life. Look in history you can’t find anyone who is not ridiculed for their ideas.

6- At the end of the day your purpose will be accepted.

Ideas are scary, especially when you are the one who have them. If you fear the status quo, you will die with it. If you are strong enough to take risk of the consequences then you speak it and take whatever comes. Many are pushed away, killed for their ideas and belief. It is the weak responsibility to display congruity through violence. The smart shape the idea and the rest execute it. Live your purpose even though you are persecuted for it. At the end, probably after you passed away, you will be remembered for your contribution. That will be your legacy.

7- It takes time.

purpose takes cultivation. It needs continuous growth before seeing its results. It took Beethoven 4 years for its genius masterpiece and Jesus 30 years to teach and have followers and Einstein many years to write his papers. The result of purpose is seen out of unseen practices and studies. What you have inside is seen on outside. Perfecting something takes time. Don’t rush through life. Don’t look for shortcuts in life. Take the hardest way out. You won’t regret it.

8- Read books.

People live based on experience. And experiences are limited. If you live on leftovers of your limited perspectives then you lost a lot. You should see far from the shore. There is land that has beautiful trees, sunny sky and fertile land. With reading you change your world fast. You get perspective of many authors.  For some of you reading is a habit. If it is then you should take care of information overload. Some people read as an addiction. When it becomes an addiction, then it gives you a constant check point where you reflect on yourself but you can’t change that fact for you don’t have the time and the space in your mind. If you know your purpose, then you are lucky already. Leave this pc and go live it.

9- If you find your purpose then you are lucky.

This means you found something that you live for 24 hours a day. It is something that you could work for, for free. You are unique here. You are one of the few out there in the world. If you’re in this category, you should start producing something that could be seen and useful.  Thinking and reading, contemplating ideas is good, but your purpose is best expressed though action. Have an idea or a project and go do it, no matter how small or useless it seems and learn from it.

10- You have the right to change your destiny.

I don’t believe we are destined to some written destiny. We can choose our life where we live, whom we marry and more. Adam and eve changed their face by not respecting the commandment they got. Criminals change their destiny by breaking the rules. The scientist says we can’t say the rat is dead or not dead until it eats or pass the poisoned food. You have minimum of two options in any situation : to speak or to silence; to be happy or to be sad. You can live your purpose or live your night mare. It is up to you.

11- Money is the least of things to measure worth of your purpose.

You are wrong if you think your highly paid friend is living better than you in his purpose. Money doesn’t measure purpose. There are millions of people who hate their jobs regardless of the payment. I remember times I wanted to run away even having an attractive position and good salary. These riches do not reflect your purpose. Don’t measure yourself or your purpose against material gains.

 

 

 

 

I don’t know what to do in my life

I don’t know what to do in my life : 5 tips to figure out what grand thing to do in your life

“I don’t know what to do in my life” Many people question the purpose of their life on earth. They are confused. If you feel that you don’t know what you are doing, if you are bored of life and you need it won’t happen, you are not alone. Many people are trying to figure it out. People in the first world are looking for a deeper meaning of life that could get them happiness. They are searching the secret key that could show them the trail to eternal success and purposeful life.

If you are like most of the people out there, you don’t know what to do in your life. You keep pushing yourself into over thinking, depression and over compensation of your actions by doing what things that hurt you. Forgetting your purpose and live for others as if others are better than you are.

You don’t stand for nothing because it does not matter if you choose the first or the second. It all same for you as long as they like it. Or as long as it fits. You don’t have your choice, your friends choose what you order for lunch, at least you hesitate.

This is not all new. But you should figure out your life before it is too late. I will give you five points you should consider to figure out what you have to do I your life so that you could be happy.

1-Change a place

Most of the time, where we live what we do affects our life. If you are dependent and if you waste your money living off your mother’s couch, think again. You should stand up and get the hell out. You should start your own life. The purpose of life doesn’t come to you on air like the myths. You should go and find them. The good things in life are not handed cheap, they need you dig a surface, enter a pit, wash the dirt off, filter the valuable from the rest and you shall find them in smallest form shiny and beautiful. Asking a question, reading more on purpose does not change a thing. You shall go out and hustle.

The first step should be being responsible. Even though this doesn’t make a sense, this is the path. And it is messy. You shall go through it. And think again, in the dark there is the enemy, there is the wild beasts there are the insects that drink out your blood out of your body. But you have to do it any ways. You should stand up and find your destiny. And that is not found in your messy bed room and that is not in your friend’s conversation and that is not in that rich man’s pocket and that is not in new boyfriend’s world. It is inside you and you should find it by going against the wind.

2-Stand for something

“If you haven’t found something you are willing to die for, you aren’t fit to live.” -Martin Luther King, Jr.

If you don’t have value to live with, if you don’t have purpose to live for, you are not fit to live. This is harsh, I know. And it hurts me much to say this. But that is the truth. And the truth shall set us free. If you don’t have value in life, then set it now. The book says ‘’love others as much as you love yourself.’’ You are not obliged to love others more than you love yourself. You are told, even in religion, to love others as much as you love yourself. And even if you want, you can’t.

You should set your value here. A drug head who says he loves you or a woman with multiple partners who thinks she is in love with you, does not love you. Because she does not love herself in the first place. She does not love her body. She does not value it. Your purpose is aligned with your value. What you value in life affects your way to your purpose. After realizing this, you should be able to figure out for what to stand for. What is that itches you for long and you shut your lips off not to speak. What is it that only you are thinking about to change but no one else does. Think what is that one thing you want to do so that the people will recognize you for.

While talking about how he selects winners on a competition, a professional photographer jury, said ‘’If I say, damn, I wish that was my work, then It means it is good work.’’

Look up to people whose life is more fulfilled than you. What are they doing? Can you stand for what they stand for? Can you copy their cause in your own context or invent one, aligned with your purpose? Do something.

3-Have a challenge

Challenges make you stronger. If you are like those boys in your town who chew tobacco all day and look for clubs at night watch out. You will keep questioning yourself for the rest of your days. You need to have a target to achieve a year from now, gain 20 pounds. Lose 12 pounds, finish school before 30, get a raise at job. A challenge makes your stronger. It gives you reason to live for.

Promise to wake up at 6 every day.

And do it. I know this is very little. But this are the things that we wish to have looking other’s life. Wake up and get exercise, make breakfast and surprise your family. Run few kilometres each day.  Or write 1000 words about your life every day. Have note book and write your thoughts. Do the things that you were procrastinating for months. Stand up and do them.   Don’t quit until the day you promised yourself to finish.

4-Write your life and change it

Start a diary. If you already have it. Then read it back and see what is similar. What is the top three things that you complain about? Single them out.  You know life is vague and cannot be told as a movie that you see in an hour or two. It’s much more complicated. I know African story that father told us when we were children.

There was a farmer with bulls and cows on his farm.

Every night, the barn was without peace. The noise from the cattle could not give him sleep and neighbours were complaining a lot.  He thought for a while and the next evening he separated the cattle in two places. He noticed the one on the left slept peacefully that night. The next morning, he separated the groups of bulls that were disturbing all night. And he noticed one group was peaceful.

He kept separating the group that was making noise and fighting. You know the ending. At last he found that it was one bull that was disturbing the group and he had to work on that bull to make it useful for his farm. Life is same. You have to understand your life, figure out your purpose out of the blurred world and be it. Writing gives you a tool to dissect your thoughts.

5-You make the rules

After all, you make the rules. When you study hard at school, who got the A? It was you. When you don’t study and get D, it was you who get that. It is up to you to study or not; to be or not to be. You make the rules.  Then make the rules. One person I have heard speaking on social media once said, you have to find what you want to do even if that does not seem useful and do that.

Shape your thought, what you wear, how you speak, with whom to be and do that.

Don’t listen what the world says. Don’t listen to your hesitating heart. Design your life style around what you want to do and practice it for years. Don’t rush. What is got with time is more valuables. Work on yourself. Don’t flinch from your life design. Be that everywhere until you want to change that. Then one day you will find yourself telling your story for other. You will find yourself inspiring others. But your live starts here.

Now, I have told you five main points. To find your purpose, first you have to change your physical conditions, then you should figure out what to stand for, even if it seems silly. Then to achieve that or other goals in life set a goal and challenge yourself. And on the process, change your habit. Document your life and reflect on it and finally review your life and make the rules to design your life.

And live that life you imagined the heck out it.

 

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purpose in life _ grand self

Know your purpose in life, build a brand and market the hell out of it.

purpose in life _ grand self‘’Last week I was in the zone, in the mood. I had these three ideas I wanted to do as a purpose in life. They were not meant to get me money nor they were part of my ideals of what my purpose in life is. But I had them in mind so deep, I wanted to do them. This week I am already bored of one, and I have picked new one. My life is full of picking and dropping ideas. In fact, I have witnessed some people picking up the craps I dropped and turned them into tangible. When shall this madness stop and real contribution of mine takes place?’’

Here I need to share what I have learnt the ways to identify your purpose in life, build a brand around it and make yourself useful out of it.

Keep working on your purpose in life in this cluttered world

Years before, life was similar for almost all. The American dream, and many other dreams that are not defined with two words. The life principle of our parents was to ‘’get schooled, follow rules, get decent job and serve the company until retirement and get pension for the rest of your life.’’ This system was not in fact a bad deal for most. You know they say ‘’in the land of the blind, one eyed man is a king/queen.’’ (excuse my quote.)

They would not have known a better life than the one that paid the mortgage. They had to survive on whatever they were given. For authors like Seth Godin, this life is no more appealing for the ‘computer generation’. Jobs could be created in a snap of finger and gone in same snap of finger. Your purpose in life in the previous world is to stick in and work hard, not stick out and be unique. This kept you safe in the group.

Ridicule and criticism is not for these who sticks in but these that stick out.

They say ‘’stay in the group, walk together and you will be fine.’’ It’s like being in a class and you don’t know the answer. And the teacher points at you while you are contemplating and praying they wouldn’t pick you. You try not to make sudden move, no eye contact, stay similar to others. But you are picked. No matter how much you try to stick in, there is probability that you will be picked as other will be picked.

Today, there are thousands of medias, thousands of newspapers and thousands of books. Mediums are not scarce as were years before. You no more only follow BBC because there are hundreds of BBCs in the world that can give you same level of quality news. The question in this era, as some said, is not ‘’who is speaking, but who is heard.’’

Information overload is the new disease. Lack of knowledge and information limited the life of our parents and information overload limited our lives.

Today, purpose in life is mistakenly judged in three main ways.

1-Money:

everyone in this age is talking about the money. Money money…Don’t get me wrong, money great motivation. But this can’t be your entire purpose in life. I say, this even should not motivate you to live your purpose. In fact, most people that made change in history were poor and they lived a life fulfilled and poured out to us even to this day.

Jesus was poor. Even his disciples have written, they would not love him on first sight as he was weak and not graceful. Buddha left comfort of his house and left in to wilderness to follow his heart and his purpose in life. Marx was so poor he didn’t have money to feed his children at some point. His family members passed away in starvation while many average minds live in comfort at the time. Money is not the purpose, it is something that drives you to your purpose in life, if you need it.

2-Kardasians:

Are the Kardashian living their purpose in life? Who knows. There are many families that are dreaming the Kardashian, their nude bottom, their glittering life, their fake appearance and dysfunctional relations. Millions are hooked on their shows. These figures become an example for the purpose fulfilled, diminishing smart minds and day dreamers.

This life was once, unfulfilled for our ancestors, in fact it was life despised. The recent music in raps, hip-hop and even other genres became a voice of the trash, addition, prostitution, gang, destroying own body, misogyny and more. Yet, we our life with these figures and they are our role model. I have to quote it again, ‘in the land of the blind, one eyed man is…’

(Hope you won’t hate me by this time. I am telling the truth.)

3-  The third superficial measure of fulfilment of life is marketing.

This is a world that everything is exaggerated. Godin talks about the reality of marketing in this age, saying ‘This is a product x, it has this average use; it is used by average people…’ Would you buy it?’’ He asks.  He replies ‘’no, no one would buy it. NO one likes average.’’

Therefore, a simple hair cream is advertised with models with long hair who have never tried the product before; cars are advertised with handsome men without flaws but are poor and living in their mother’s basement; burgers are advertised with big chested and tiny waisted women who never eat burgers. Looks and actions are deceiving and are exaggerated. You would be mistaken if you judge people’s purpose in life based on what you see. You should learn to look beyond the superficial, beyond what they wear, beyond the dialog.

If you understand how to not measure others and yourself in this age, then here is the secret in today’s age to live a fulfilled purposeful life.

1-Wobbling mind

The author of ‘the way of superior man’, writes, the purpose in life is different from the ideas that fly in your mind picking and dropping each day. These are not your purpose in life. The real purpose is what makes you urge more. This is what stick all time. This is you yourself. You can’t find this type of your purpose by reading a book or reading this article. This, you only can find it, sitting with yourself and thinking it through. What was it that you wanted to be when you were a child, or before you lost your identity. What is it the ticks you or what is that one or two things that everyone talks about you. Of course, I am following that humanistic path to purpose in life. But that answering these questions should give you your heart’s urge.

2-Once you find that, stick to it.

Develop it. Do it once a day, at least after work. Or if you have the money quit what you are doing and work on your purpose in life, if you are a writer, write the word of your dreams and products of your mind and share it. Keep doing it until it seems you are obsessed. Don’t listen to what people say, don’t fear the criticism. As Godin says life without criticism is for the ones that stick in and once you stick out and standout be sure criticism is on the way. For him life is like art and you are an artist. You have the option to keep in dark away from criticism or show your work and receive criticism. It’s up to you.

3-Then the next process it to create your brand.

I call it manifestation. Think of how to turn the idea, the abstract into material. For example. Think how your business personality could be manifested in your clothing, in your thinking, in your speech…Then be it. Live it. Wear it. Don’t wear suit, because someone else does. Wear what fits your brand. With this you create your brand, your image. This is what people talks of you.

John the Baptist of the bible, used to live in desert, eating grasshopper and desert honey. And that was what was what was written of him when he went to town to baptize people. Now you can imagine what his hair would look like, what his clothing would look like and what his social life would look like. His looks, designed or not, fit the purpose and no other was in town that looked like him.

4-Next step is to market it.

It seems cheating like the hair cream ads. But you should follow the 80-20 rule here. Work the 20 percent and advertise 80 percent of the time. Believe me the others are advertising themselves every time with the fake books and human hair and bad personality even on TV. They are showing off their extravagance, degrading women, talking trash. And  the ignorant majority admire them. If they did it 100 percent of the time, paying millions, why can’t you do it by marketing your 20 percent achievement by the 80 percent of your time? You should market your work, your life, your deeds.

Now pick your pen and write your thought on your purpose in life as much as you can. Cross out the clutter after a little thought. Look back the list after few days. Repeat the process until you find one or two things that you can manage, and work on it few months and even few years. In the process manifest the idea of your purpose to the world. Create your lifestyle and live it.

Finally, it is not about who is talking but who is being listened to. You don’t need money to advertise yourself but you have your uniqueness. And your uniqueness tells a story itself. And this image is real, earned, and it is a story told from the heart. Only your purpose in life makes you the legend in the life that you are day dreaming of.